Chinese Spy Games Update

Well it turns out that my Chinese secret agent friend is actually a tour guide in training. So much for my James Bondesque fantasies of Chinese secret agents hot on my trail…

But now, I’ve realized that I’ve been duped. All along it turns out, kind, sweet Emily; tour-guide extraordinaire, is ACTUALLY the spy. Well, spy-in-training in my estimation. It’s the perfect front: Have a young, non-intimidating Asian girl provide city tours for westerners so she can learn their subtle language and behavioral complexities. I mean for God’s sake, she used the phrase HERDING CATS! What Chinese person… what ANY person outside of the US would know what the flip “Herding Cats” means?

Only the hyper-aware, as I sometimes consider myself, would pick up on these tell-tale signs.

Don’t believe me? Well how about this one:

Just yesterday she mentioned that she was trying to learn an American accent.

Translation: It will be easier for me to steal American nuclear secretes while lulling my American military contact into a false sense of security with my folksy, down-home southern drawl.

Oh.. and here’s another one… just today, on our way back to the hotel in our bus, we dropped her off at the “office” so she can “prepare” for her next tour group. Surrrrre, Emily… PLAN for the next group indeed!